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crazieazn013
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Name: Clara Hannah
Birthday: 3/17/1987
Gender: Female
Interests: Loving God, reading the Bible, praying, listening to music, reading, watching Good Eats
Expertise: lazing about on my butt =D
Occupation: student at CWRU =D
Industry: spreading the Gospel
Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:  crazieazn013
Member Since:
8/25/2003
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| Hello!
So this is my last summer update.
School starts on the 23rd~~
My sister and I are slowly moving in. Haha a few boxes go in everyday =)
i heard a sermon today. the pastor was talking about John's epistles and how he warns against false preachers. and that you know the antichrist, because they will not believe the truth about Jesus Christ. That they will not believe He is God in the flesh. That He died for our sins. and That He lives again.
anyway, for some reason that got me really down. and i started to feel exhausted. as if i had been battling with people about this truth.
and then like a still small voice God said, 'this is what this year will be like after working in the hospitals. there will be many antichrist spirits at work. and many patients will believe the wrong things. and nothing can change them otherwise. and you will feel exhausted from fighting against them.'
so here is my prayer.
i'm going to fighting at the frontlines soon. I need strength. i need to know that God is with me. He's my strength. My defense. I need prayer for being able to unload to Jesus every night, otherwise despair will consume me.
please help.
on a brighter note. I am a sunday school teacher and I absolutely love my kids. they are so adorable!!!!
=)
I hope i can get pictures up ~~
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| Hello!
long overdue update, I know. and I know some people are waiting for me to post this up ^_^
i originally wanted to write when I had found a part-time job, so that I could tell everyone about it.
alas, no part-time job.
instead i have been working at my parent's dry cleaners. our pick up store, that's usually very slow.
but this is fine, because i'm needed. my dad has a new job. he's working at a distribution center for Kroger, a big grocery chain here in columbus. he's working full-time (8 hr shifts) plus over-time. must work on holidays. no say in schedule. and most sundays he's also working...
all this because the pay is better
i don't mind working at our dry cleaners. heck its the only job i know i can do well. don't need training for. but i was (and still am) upset at my dad's new job. i just get a not so great feeling. it doesn't seem right. and at first i was very bitter. because he's taken on this new job, my sisters and i are, essentially, forced to watch our pick up store. and my mom has to press everything from 7a to 7p. and i'm not free to go on any retreats. and i was thinking, "what kind of dad is he? should a man of God, who's a father put his children's spiritual state first. shouldn't he do what he can so that we can grow? instead he's working even sundays just so there's more money, for what? to keep our huge house that he can't even enjoy? the house that my sisters and i leave when we go to college?????"
but, i'm over that now. and yet, i'm still uneasy about his job. so I'm praying its only temporary. i'm praying that he finds something that's he's passionate for. something that fits him. my mom thinks my dad wants this job because he wants something new, something different from dry cleaning that we've been doing for the past 16 yrs. and actully, if you really think about it. we could've made our business big. but our dad isn't a businessman. and he should not be doing manual labor at Kroger just for some extra cash...
i know there's gotta be something that suits him. So i pray that until my dad opens his eyes to his true calling. that he'll be safe at his new job. that he doesn't wear himself out. and that this is only temporary...
anyway, God is still good. because as some of my friends know. i was originally looking for part time jobs in Korea and Virginia to tutor english and gain from spending cash, and rent money for the school year.
well, i may be working at my parent's store. but i am also tutoring~
a friend of mine asked me if i might consider tutoring her boyfriend's brother. he's going to art school in chicago, he just came from Korea and his level of english is... like the water level in the sahara? is that too mean?
anyway, i've been tutoring him for about two and a half weeks now. he leaves for chicago tomorrow.
i'll post up a pic soon
ever since i've been tutoring me, the koreans in the young adult group at my church have been interested. one in particular wants me to help him with his writing.
AND i will also start tutoring a couple of kids 9 and 10 yr olds. i'll be paid $10 per kid per hour. and we're meeting every day from monday to friday. so even if we meet for only an hour a day. that's $100 a week =)
that will do nicely for rent money. at least for a little bit.
but i only need to make money for a down payment on a car..
so that's what's up with me.
i'm nervous about this tutoring business. because i'm not like a professional. and these people are paying me to teach them english. what if they don't learn anything? then it's like money down the drain...
so i'm praying that i will do the best i can. ^_^
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| Hello!
okie, so I should update, cuz lots of cool lessons I've the past two weeks
so for Labor Day weekend, I went home. and went to a retreat that my church was having.
The song that's playing is my pastor's favorite, called footsteps. and roughly translated the lyrics go
Following a calling I can't refuse, stepping out in faith
Fearful, walking an unknown path, God guides me
Believing in my calling, whatever the obstacle
Jesus leads me and by faith I move my feet
Looking only to Jesus, may my footsteps not wander in temptation
But like precious treasure, may my complete faith allow me to
Stay in the middle of Your will.
really great song. love it soo much too ^_^
----
next, my dad was telling me about one of the activities the speaker had the people do during one of his messages.
so you write down 20 of what you consider most valuable. not only material things like jewelery, car, etc. but also things like family, honor, time, health.
and then through mini games, the people who lose will have to "throw away" their valuables. but there's no winner to this because in the end EVERYONE is told to throw EVERYTHING except for one.
now obviously, the "correct" answer to have God left, but it doesn't work that way, even though they are just pieces of paper.
so we did a mini version of this at home, and its really interesting to see what I considered valuable. my sister commented that I still held on to manners, after throwing away time, sleep, and health.
but what was more interesting to me, was that at the end I was left with a choice, loving God and spreading the Gospel.
my instinct was to keep spreading the Gospel, and i threw away loving God.
this is so interesting to me. because loving God has always been what I want to do. like if you could summarize my walk with Christ through middle school, high school, and even through college now, its been all about being in love with Jesus, being his lover, wanting to be called Jesus' beloved.
but at that moment, my instinct was the consider spreading the Gospel my most valued item.
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the speaker had talked of how when he did this, he also had to choose between God and prayer, and in the end he threw away even prayer, so that all he had left was God.
this speaker is absolutely amazing. he TRULY lives his life trying to model after Jesus.
he told a story how when an elder at his church (in the countryside in Korea) came to him and said that he would buy him a car. the speaker decided instead to buy a bike, because the money he'd save on gas, he could donate to a ministry that schools children and also teaches them about Christ.
i was absolutely jealous. I wanted to be able to live like that. I don't want to be bound my expectations of this world. but to live in the countryside, not worryinga bout what i wear, how i look. but simply pastor people in need, to throw all my cares into them. that's how i want to live. but i can't
i don't know why. but i pray that i will
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my dad told me another activity they did
it based off the encounter Jacob had with God. He wrestled with him all night, and God gave him a new name, from the Deceiver, to Israel, God's people.
so the speaker had everyone spend time alone, no talking, out in nature (the retreat was held a metro park) and ask God for a new name, one that would define who He wanted us to be.
My dad went out and saw wildflowers. They aren't like the popular roses, or tulips, but simple wildflowers. yet they were still beautiful in the sunlight, right next to the path. and my dad thought I want to be God's seed. no matter where it ends up, or what it turns into, it grows because of God. So I want to be God's seed. and now my dad's new name is Seed.
i was sooo excited to try this myself too. and actually, God's so gracious, because I knew who I was in God, I know my name, my purpose. But I wanted to remind myself, to be affirmed.
So this past sunday, while waiting for praise practice to end, I went outside and just walked along the perimeter of the property. there's lots of trees and woods. so I walked, talking to God, asking him to speak to me and show me again who he wants me to be.
so I turned around, and I faced this line of trees. They were tall, and leaves were moving in the wind. My first thoughts were, these trees look sturdy. And they were in a line, so they looked like they were standing for battle. They don't move, except to the wind. Then I thought, I want to be strong like these tree, unbending except only to God's will, and ready to fight, ready to be a support, something that people could draw strength from.
So my new name is Strong Tree.
My mission in life is to be unbending and strong. A source of strength for others. Moving only to God's will.
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